video review : Black Swan

video review : Black Swan

I don’t get the aesthetic allure of ballet. What I appreciate on a sexual level is watching dainty girls parade around in tights. If Black Swan is a realistic representative of the ballet world, I’m not alone in my perversion. Lewd sex is a major theme here. It’s a driving force for nearly every major character. Even the relationship between mother and daughter had me anticipating a sex scene between the two.

The problem is that the story is too ambiguous. The diegetic reason for that is because Nina, the dancer it revolves around, tends to hallucinate. She apparently has a major mental disorder, perhaps brought on by said Mommy, whom she still lives with and clings to at the age of twenty-something. Black Swan, a movie that wasn’t really engaging in the first place, soon loses its way in a barrage of horror-flick clichés.

my rating : 2 of 5

2010

video review : Gone Girl

video review : Gone Girl

Girl Gone would’ve been a better title, but that fault goes to the Gillian Flynn book this movie is based on. It’s a novel not based on a true story because true stories aren’t (usually) this melodramatic. It starts off decently; a man’s wife goes missing and he’s suspected of murdering her; but the plot loses its way to what, in a crime flick that’s supposed to be realistic, equates to utter absurdity during the final third.

my rating : 2 of 5

2014

audio review : Let’s Get It On ( song ) … Macho Man Randy Savage

The best part of this song is the beat, which works with a sort of hip-hop rock chemistry. It takes amatuer production to new heights with everything from the crunch snare to the addition of coliseum-inspired horns and automated crowd cheers where applicable.

Over the music, Randy’s laughably simple raps don’t sound as bad as they should. By the second verse, where he declares “It’s not wise to mess with Randy cause you’ll catch a beat-down to the third degree”, you’re actually bobbing your head and getting amped to it.

my rating : 2 of 5

2003

audio review : Love The Way You Lie ( song ) … Eminem ( featuring Rihanna )

What’s bad is that Eminem, who has the potential to be one of the edgiest rappers in the world, is down to making generic love songs. What’s worse is that he’s decided to recruit the singing voice of Rihanna; one of pop music’s most annoying.

This is a song about a romantic relationship gone wrong; “wrong” in the sense that everything isn’t all right like it was when the guy and the girl first met. They’re fighting now, verbally and physically, only to kiss, make-up and fight again the next day.

It’s a love-hate situation with masochistic undertones; something celebrity gossip suggests both Eminem and Rihanna are familiar with. And I’d bet it happens more often than most couples would be willing to admit. But who cares. This song is boring.

Eminem’s forced delivery is bland and tiresome, especially when he’s playing the role of a pussy-whipped boyfriend involved in a domestic quarrel I couldn’t give a fuck less about. The music; maudlin rock-hop produced by Alex Da Kid; does little to help.

my rating : 2 of 5

2010

audio review : Recovery ( album ) ... Eminem

audio review : The Tonite Show ( album ) … EMC

audio review : The Tonite Show ( album ) ... EMC

Yay. They got rid of Punchline. He was an average rapper in a group with three good ones. Now, as a trio, EMC stands as one of the better the pop world has to offer. I say “pop” relunctantly because, though the name Masta Ace may ring a bell to rap fans, they’re hardly known compared to Chief Keef. That’s only part of the reason their Tonite Show concept, in which they imagine themselves guests on The Tonight Show with Jimmy “Falcon”, is so disconcerting. Another is that they already made an album called The Show. But the main reason is that the constant skits; there’s one before and after almost every song; bring the quality of the album down.

It’s a lesson Masta Ace still hasn’t learned after all these years. Ever since the Disposable Arts set, released back in 2001, every one of his albums, solo and collaborative, have been basically ruined with silly skits. They worked for the first two De La Soul albums because they, the skits, were somewhat amusing. These aren’t. That means the songs would have to be amazing to overlook them. These aren’t. The beats are decent, so it ultimately comes down to a lack of catchy hooks. The song with the best one, which also happens to be the song with the best beat; a smooth girl gamer entitled Signtology; is an easy favorite. It’s also the only favorite.

my rating : 2 of 5

2015
 

Jason Friedman :

Agree, they need to tone down on the amount of skits. Skits have no replay value, you listen to them once and that’s it. The second time listening to the LP, you’re hitting the skip button to get to the next song. The 12 songs that are actually songs on this album are INCREDIBLE. You can hear the quality of each song from start to finish. Loved the album, less skits next time. The 12 actual songs get 5 stars, easily.

kyle :

u are a hater too the fullest bring the price down because u think u know wat ur talkin about oh and disposable arts was so good so wasnt long hot summer so stfu fagget

Amazon Basics On-Ear Headphones

Amazon Basics On-Ear Headphones

I guess the sound quality is fine. I don’t know. I can’t wear these long enough to tell. The headband is too tight. Even at its widest stretch, it feels like it’s designed to induce headaches.

I’m an adult male with I think a normal-sized head, but even if I have a relatively large one, these headphones should be marketed for, because they’re perfectly suited for, petite women and kids.

I love the way they look though. They’re all black with no visible logos. The included black pouch also comes in handy even if you give your headphones away like I did. I use mine as a murse.

my rating : 2 of 5

audio review : Sharp On All 4 Corners [ 1 + 2 ] ( albums ) … E-40

audio review : Sharp On All 4 Corners [ 1 + 2 ] ( albums ) ... E-40 audio review : Sharp On All 4 Corners [ 1 + 2 ] ( albums ) ... E-40

There’s a track here entitled Heavy In The Game. The song itself, a duet with B-Legit, is nothing special, but the beat is a slapper. It’s the type of music that should dominate E-40 albums instead of standing as basically the sole highlight amongst a collection of songs that, despite the set title, are comparatively dull.

Sleep, a sex anthem featuring Ludacris and Plies, is enticing, but almost every other track of the 28 included here isn’t. And this is just the first two of another four-album project, reportedly. So while E-40 is more prolific than ever, it is, unfortunately for us long-time fans, an ongoing case of quantity over quality.

my rating : 2 of 5

2014
 

R. Orwig :

You might need a hearing aid playa, cuz most of these tracks slap on here. There might be a total of 5 tracks on here that are average, but most of both albums are dope!

Total Slaughter : Hollow Da Don versus Joe Budden

Total Slaughter : Hollow Da Don versus Joe Budden

The battle judges say it’s Joe Budden, but the real loser is anyone who paid their hard-earned money to watch this overhyped fiasco. Both rappers had months to prepare but neither manages to come-up with anything spectacular, and hardly anything clever or interesting, to say about the other. Hollow’s puberty voice and tough-guy act are annoying, so all the while I’m hoping for him to lose, but he’s generally a decent rapper, so I thought he’d do better than this.

His lamest moment comes during the third (final) round when he stops rapping to play Captain-Save-A-Ho, threatening to beat-up Joe Budden for hitting women, which makes him (Hollow) look like a total idiot. Budden’s lamest moment comes during that same round when the rapper lets crowd booing get to him. “If yall keep booing,” he says, “I will stop rapping completely.” How embarrassing. He should’ve just kept going. It’s not like he was being slaughtered or anything.

my rating : 2 of 5

video review : Ghostbusters

video review : Ghostbusters

The Ghostbusters are annoying. Peter’s deadpan humor is particularly eye-rolling, but none are as bad as a nerdy accountant who’s, at one point, possessed by a demon called The Keymaster.

This is a silly movie with a silly plot. The main problem is that it goes for comedy and isn’t funny, nor is it scary; a double whammy that serves as a virtual death sentence for a movie about ghosts.

my rating : 2 of 5

1984

audio review : Turning Point ( EP ) … EMC

audio review : Turning Point ( EP ) … EMC

Masta Ace has been doing the skit thing for a while. He should stop. It’s a lame idea that does little more than bring his albums down. This EMC group release qualifies as an EP; not the official follow-up to their Show album, which is said to come later this year; but it’s no exception. The skits, most of which consist of Superbowl phone dialogue about the group’s return via Penalty Records, aren’t funny or particularly interesting. And there are seven; one before and after every song.

The rappers, with the exception of a weak Punchline; EMC really would be a lot stronger without him; are still nice as far as skills go, so the songs are best during their verses. Masta Ace uses a lot of lazy similes; hopefully he’s saving his best rhymes for the full album; but all three (MCs) are consistently better than average. The hooks, two of which are based on silly kid chants; the “monkey” bit on Sweet Potato Fries irks me almost as much as the Charly Murphie shout; don’t fare as well.

my rating : 2 of 5

2014

audio review : Shine On ( album ) … Sarah McLachlan

audio review : Shine On ( album ) ... Sarah Mclachlan

Shine is an antonym for dullness, so perhaps there is a hint of tongue-in-cheek humor in the title of this album. Most likely not. Sarah McLachlan isn’t one for jokes. Her music, it seems, even the happy Love songs, are meant to be taken dead-seriously. No fun allowed.

That was okay on Surfacing when most of the songs were good, but she’s slipped off that surface and fell hard since. She should never abandon Pierre Marchand and the lush soundscapes he provides, but, melody-wise, this is her third boring (non-Christmas) album in a row.

my rating : 2 of 5

2014
 

DeeGee :

I agree with this review. I couldnt put my finger on what the issue was until you mentioned that she’s not working with PM. Too bad. This music is bland.

audio review : The Block Brochure : Welcome To The Soil [ 4 | 5 | 6 ] ( albums ) … E-40

audio review : The Block Brochure : Welcome To The Soil [ 4 ] ( albums ) ... E-40 audio review : The Block Brochure : Welcome To The Soil [ 5 ] ( albums ) ... E-40 audio review : The Block Brochure : Welcome To The Soil [ 6 ] ( albums ) ... E-40

If E-40 had retired after the Grit And Grind album, most, if not all, of his albums would’ve been good. Instead he continued on; he’s released an unprecedented twelve in just the last four years; and hasn’t put out a good one since.

These Block Brochures continue the series as a set it’d be deadly holding your breath trying to find a good song on. The others had some. These have hardly any, thanks almost exclusively to an abundance of weak hooks.

my rating : 2 of 5