This sequel, which fans of the original had to wait 36 years for, is abysmally disappointing during its first half. It isn’t until Beetlejuice; the title cleverly makes way for a future trilogy; is conjured that the plot starts to come to life. It’s still a stupid movie; a definite drop down from the aforementioned original; but there are wacky bits of fun buried about.
my rating : 2 of 5
2024
Beetlejuice is supposed to be funny. It occasionally is; “I’ve been feeling a little flat”, says a man who looks like he was killed by a steamroller; but the nonstop jokes, led by its title comedian slash “bio-exorcist”, are mostly corny. The two lip-synced song/dance scenes; easily the worst parts of the movie; are downright cringey. A moderately entertaining plot, about a dead married couple trying to scare a family out of their house, lies (buried) underneath.
my rating : 3 of 5
1988
1990
I don’t get the aesthetic allure of ballet. What I appreciate on a sexual level is watching dainty girls parade around in tights. If Black Swan is a realistic representative of the ballet world, I’m not alone in my perversion. Lewd sex is a major theme here. It’s a driving force for nearly every major character. Even the relationship between mother and daughter had me anticipating a sex scene between the two.
The problem is that the story is too ambiguous. The diegetic reason for that is because Nina, the dancer it revolves around, tends to hallucinate. She apparently has a major mental disorder, perhaps brought on by said Mommy, whom she still lives with and clings to at the age of twenty-something. Black Swan, a movie that wasn’t really engaging in the first place, soon loses its way in a barrage of horror-flick clichés.
my rating : 2 of 5
2010
Edward has scissors for hands, but no one ever says why. All his backstory explains is that the scissors, which, like his mountain home and the personalities of the people in the surrounding neighborhood he eventually pierces, are largely exaggerated, were supposed to be temporary. The man who invented him died just before putting on his hands.
Not that it matters much. Scissorhands, a well-mannered ghost of a man dressed in all leather like a slave in a bondage session, is more annoying than intriguing and I don’t care anything about him. Even when a plot finally begins to develop, it’s all in vain. The fairy tale epilogue, which explains the origin of snow in pastel Suburbia, is cute though.
my rating : 2 of 5
1990