Category: reviews with a 3 of 5 rating

audio review : Connected And Respected ( album ) … E-40 + B-Legit

audio review : Connected And Respected ( album ) ... E-40 + B-Legit

Fans have been waiting for a new Click album for several years. I guess this, the first set from its two best rappers, will have to do. E-40 and B-Legit have long gone together like peanut butter and jelly. While the former is the obvious star, the latter is no slouch on the mic. He says he’s “mad underrated”. Replace “mad” with “a tad” and I’d agree. He never alters his monotone style, but it works for him.

With that, the duo, who also happen to be cousins, have the verses on lock. They’re the best parts of the album. The worst parts have to do with the songs themselves, specifically when it comes to the breaks. Nearly every one of these songs has a dull; or in the case of Tap In, Whooped and Boy, downright annoying; hook. That’s a major aesthetic problem, along with the abundance of vapid hood beats.

my rating : 3 of 5

2018

audio review : Venom ( album ) … U-God

audio review : Venom ( album ) ... U-God

The best beats here are produced by Green Lantern. Epicenter, one of the few songs not bogged down by lame breaks, has the DJ channeling a young Rza. Most of the others are comparatively inept.

It’s called Venom because that’s what U-God thinks he’s spitting. I disagree; his wordplay is unexceptional to me; but, for what it’s worth, he is one of my favorite members of the Wu-Tang Clan.

my rating : 3 of 5

2018
 

NAME_NOT_RETURNED :

I think something is wrong with your eardrums if you think that the best beats on the album is Epicenter. In fact U-God has proven that he still has the exact flow from the early 90’s on epicenter but he also transcends his unique and versatile flow into this new age era Hip Hop. This dude recreates himself so many times. That’s how he’s able to stay relevant for twenty-five years! And let’s not forget that the fans started crying that Wu-Tang’s flow was too difficult to decipher. Therefore, most of them dumbed down their lyrics for the exception of critics like you in. This album is very inspirational and a Hip Hop classic! And those tracks with Jackpot Scotty Wotty?! Fire bro! With all due respect sir.

audio review : Sex And Cigarettes ( album ) … Toni Braxton

audio review : Sex And Cigarettes ( album ) ... Toni Braxton

This album is far from being as edgy as the title and cover photo suggest, but it should be. When Toni Braxton wanders out of her comfort zone, as on a bitter breakup ballad called Fuck Outta Here, her sentiments are engaging.

Most of these songs are “sad love songs” that deal with being cheated on or otherwise done wrong by “you”, but the short 30-minute set, satisfyingly decent during the first half, goes up in a vapid cloud of smoke during the second.

my rating : 3 of 5

2018

audio review : Chloraseptic ( song ) … Eminem ( featuring Phresher )

The title simile isn’t as fresh as Eminem seems to think it is. He’s “at your throat”, in lyrical attack mode, but this Chloraseptic isn’t Maximum Strength. It’s the weak generic version that has him spitting more like Wale than that battle rapper from 8 Mile.

Still the “geyser” part, in which he Relapses into a knife-wielding slut-killer for four bars, is creative. Other quirky tidbits include him giving an off-beat compliment to a girl with the “prettiest thighs” and wooing like Ric Flair after ripping a condom in two.

my rating : 3 of 5

2017

audio review : Revival ( album ) … Eminem

video review : The Hitcher

video review : The Hitcher

The first several minutes are creepy and intense. Early one rainy morning, a young driver named Jim Halsey makes the foolish decision to pick up a hitchhiker. That man, who says his name is John Ryder, turns out to be a psychopathic murderer.

The movie could go interesting places from there but doesn’t. The claustrophobic driver/passenger concept is abandoned for what becomes a grueling game of cat and mouse, marked by unlikely set-ups and a silly Bonnie-Clyde-like subplot.

my rating : 3 of 5

1986

audio review : River Of Dreams ( album ) … Billy Joel

audio review : River Of Dreams ( album ) ... Billy Joel

The first three songs are adequate enough. If nothing else, they show that Billy Joel still has a knack for songcraft after all these years. The River starts to go downhill from there. He’s swimming hard; All About Soul is backed by what sounds like a full gospel choir; but about half of this album will drift you off to sleep.

my rating : 3 of 5

1993

audio review : Man Of The Woods ( album ) … Justin Timberlake

audio review : Man Of The Woods ( album ) ... Justin Timberlake

Boomy beats and flashy synths conflict with the concept, which suggests a minimalist soundscape led by acoustic guitars, but this is the kind of music you’ve come to expect from Pop singer Justin Timberlake. Producers The Neptunes are back at the helm. Timbaland, who handled most of the previous “20/20” project, is reduced to just a few songs, the best of which begins the album with a Filthy funk groove.

Other standouts include Higher Higher, Montana and the album title track. Midnight Summer Jam might be just that, but winter comes quick on Flannel, which vibes like a Christmas hymn. The album could do (better) without pretentious interludes from wife Jessica Biel and real-life clips of the couple playing with their Young Man are more annoying than cute, but the set is decidely decent on the whole.

my rating : 3 of 5

2018

video review : The BFG

video review : The BFG

This Disney adaption of The BFG, a 1982 children’s book by Roald Dahl, might have been big fun if director Steven Spielberg had taken more liberties with the plot. The first few minutes, in which a giant old man snatches a little orphan girl in the dead of night, are somewhat intriguing, but the story doesn’t really go anywhere interesting from there. The dream catching bit is silly and the Giant’s bombastic lingo is annoying, though scenes in which he hides her from Giant Country villains offer playful suspense.

my rating : 3 of 5

2016

video review : Falling Down

video review : Falling Down

The most interesting character here is an Army-Navy store owner who also happens to be a sexist racist neo-Nazi. “I’m your friend”, he says to the movie’s actual bad guy, but Bill Foster doesn’t want a friend. He just wants to go home to his wife and kid. The problem is that he’s divorced and the wife has a restraining order against him. He was an abusive husband, she suggests to police, and a nut. His breaking point comes when he gets stuck in a traffic jam one hot day.

From there, the former Notec worker abandons his car and goes on a one-man rampage on his way back “home”. The violent outbursts he lets loose when confronted with even the most minor of annoyances from the people he encounters along the way; his rage is often laced with socio-political rants; serve as an action-packed plot device. It’s the overall believability factor; some of the things he and other characters say or do are over the top; that goes against it.

my rating : 3 of 5

1993

audio review : Revival ( album ) … Eminem

audio review : Revival ( album ) ... Eminem

Framed, a song about murdering females, which the idiots of PC America apparently consider more morally acceptable than “raping” them; that word is edited out; sounds like an outtake from Relapse. That’s a good thing. Eminem continues to subtly bash that album; here he pokes fun at the accents he used; but it’s one of his best. It may have even become my favorite. I’d have to go back and compare it to The Slim Shady LP to decide. The Marshall Mathers LP is good too. Its sequel is one of his worst. Recovery, which was presumably released to counter the relatively mild commercial success of Relapse, is too. This new Revival, the title of which seems to mark the end of a trilogy; unless you count Infinite, which I don’t, Eminem doesn’t really have any stand-alone solo albums; is three. That means his worst albums are his newest albums.

One reason for that is the lack of beats by Dre. Many of the producers Eminem recruits these days are star-shaped cookie cutters. Another reason is Eminem’s reliance on bland hooks by Autotuned pop singers who, before 2010, would’ve sounded laughably out of place on an Eminem album. This one begins with Beyoncé crooning a tuneless chorus composed by Skylar Grey, who, as far as her Eminem contributions are concerned, is a talentless bore. The biggest problem with Revival though is that it seems Em no longer has what it takes to make a good album. He can barely write a good verse anymore. There are clever bars, but the rapper is a far cry from the concise wordsmith he introduced himself to the world as. He’s now a verbose, albeit complex, rhymer with a passion for mushy sentiments and corny punchlines.

He makes it clear from the beginning that he’s aware of the criticism he gets from fans like myself and he seems to take it to heart, but we’re all saying different things. A lot of people don’t like Relapse, think it’s cool to jump on the hate Trump bandwagon because their favorite celebrities do it and cry racism whenever the victim of police corruption, which is a serious problem in America, happens to be a black boy. So he makes the legacy-tarnishing mistake of trying to please the mixed masses. That makes for an album with no clear conceptual or musical cohesion. The start and end, the latter of which reinforces the trilogy theory by time-traveling to just before it began, make sense, but the middle may as well be a random selection of new Eminem songs. Or mostly Eminem songs. Need Me is literally a Pink song featuring Eminem.

“I’m better than I ever was,” the self-proclaimed Rap God declares, but that’s just ego. I wouldn’t be surprised if even he thinks the title of this album; arguably the worst of his worst, which still isn’t bad; is a joke. A real Revival would’ve been the aesthetic equivalent of Relapse 2. The Framed song gets it right. Despite the fact that the hook makes an awkward attempt to rhyme “entertain” with “me”, it’s a zany delight. The beat reminds me of Pigs from Cypress Hill. The Offended beat has no hard snares to speak of, but winks to Eminem for interpolating an obscure Worm Eaters reference. Is it my ears or are the vocals mixed a bit too low on some of these songs? Castle and Arose go well together though. Would it be better for his legacy if he’d died when he almost did? Probably. Should he retire like he said he would after Encore? Probably.

my rating : 3 of 5

2017

audio review : Untouchable ( song ) … Eminem

The music changes drastically near the halfway point and stays that way till the end. That, along with the wise decision to abandon the chorus; one of Eminem’s all-time worst; makes this basically two songs in one. The first, a satirical rock anthem from the perspective of a white racist cop, is an annoying mess, thanks mainly to the aforementioned hook. The second, rapped by the black victim, fares better, though listening to the beat in headphones reveal that the bassline is mixed in stereo; sonically a terrible idea.

On the concept, it’s true that police corruption is a major problem in America. I’m just not convinced it’s essentially a white on black problem as the boy Eminem plays strongly suggests. Many people, black and white, prematurely attribute the bad acts of crooked cops to racism when it happens to be white on black. That creates a scenario similar to The Boy Who Cried Wolf, which minimizes the effects of true racism. It’s okay if Eminem is just playing characters, but it sounds like he’s on some kind of white guilt trip.

my rating : 3 of 5

2017

audio review : Revival ( album ) ... Eminem

audio review : Friday On Elm Street ( album ) … Fabolous + Jadakiss

audio review : Friday On Elm Street ( album ) ... Fabolous + Jadakiss

The Freddy/Jason horror concept is silly and cliché. Jadakiss already played Damien from The Omen on the last Lox album. This set doesn’t need such gimmicks. An album of duets from two good rappers is alluring enough.

What these songs make clear is that Fabolous is better. Not by much. Jadakiss holds his own. The beats hold theirs too. The hooks though; Future’s Stand Up anthem being a stimulating exception; are kill-knife dull.

my rating : 3 of 5

2017