Tag: Michigan

a dream I had about hiring Pinky and Misty to exercise at my mother’s house

“What you got them girls doing in the living room?” I think that’s how my mother phrased the question with a mild tone of concern. She was talking to me from another room in the house, so I could only hear her. “That’s Misty and Pinky,” I answered back as I walked closer to where she was, talking loud enough for her to hear me but hopefully soft enough so that the girls wouldn’t. They’d been walking around doing erotic dances, but I told her they were exercising, which was also true. I’d hired them from some kind of house service I found on the internet. The deal was for them to come to my house, or my mother’s house, and basically perform a striptease in the name of good health.

I don’t remember what my mother said back to me, if anything, but it was obvious she didn’t approve of them being there. She didn’t seem upset though. It was as if she didn’t think what they were doing at the moment was too bad but figured it would soon get much worse. So I walked over to the living room where Misty, an imaginated health guru, and Pinky, the real-life porn star, were. They were still dressed, much to my relief, though Pinky had stripped down to what appeared to be some kind of sexy lingerie. “You’re not going to get naked out here, are you,” I asked, perhaps in those exact words, talking soft enough so that my mother wouldn’t hear me, “My mom is tripping.”

Pinky said she wouldn’t with a look of disappointment. She was disappointed, I figured, because she wanted to get naked and perhaps start performing sex acts for me and there I was basically telling her she couldn’t. I didn’t mean she couldn’t at all, of course, just not out in the living room where my mother or siblings could walk in and see her. I don’t know how old I was in this dream; I stopped living with my mother at the age of 16 or 17; but I’m quite sure my little brother and little sister were also at home. My plan was to have Pinky and Misty do their thing in my room with the door closed as I recorded them with my video camera. Unfortunately I awoke before that part.

2013 ( September 26 )

I miss Saturday mornings …

Those were special times when I was a kid. They marked the beginning of two back-to-back school-free days every week from September to June and, though Saturday mornings didn’t stand-out nearly as much during the summer, they were special all year round. The main reason for that is what came on TV. I watched TV at home a lot more than I do now; most of the time compared to almost never; and most of what came on from early morning to pass noon were shows you, meaning me and my older brother, had to wait all week to watch.

We were kids in the 1980s and early 1990s, so the line-up included everything from cartoons like The Smurfs and Muppet Babies; the Muppet Babies theme song remains a classic; to real-people shows like Pee-Wee’s Playhouse and WWF wrestling. I can’t forget Fraggle Rock. I can’t forget Garfield And Friends. I can’t even forget short runners like Rude Dog And The Dweebs and My Pet Monster. They’re embedded in my memory, however vague, somewhere in the part of my brain reserved for nostalgia. In fact, I still have my Pet Monster.

my Pet Monster

I think my Pound Puppies are still around too. TV shows, in that sense, came to life. Then there was the cereal I ate while I watched the shows. Oh what I’d do now for a bowl of Smurfs, or Gremlins or Mr T. They probably wouldn’t taste much different than the stuff we have now, but just holding and looking at the boxes would make it special. I don’t even remember brushing my teeth or washing-up. It seems I’d just wake-up and start watching… Kidbits. It all began with Kidbits. That show, a local science show, came on first. Ah, the memories.

The closest I’ve been able to come to those years I’ll reluctantly refer to as the golden years since they ended in the early 1990s was NBC’s “TNBC” line-up from the late 1990s. As a young adult, I got into the routine of waking-up on Saturday mornings to watch shows like Saved By The Bell, The New Class; which I’m fairly certain I watched more than I ever did the old one; Hang Time and City Guys, as I lay on the sofa I slept on upstairs in that same house I grew-up in. I was in high school by then, but those were still good times.

audio review : From Death ( album ) … Goon Squad

audio review : From Death ( album ) ... Goon Squad

This Goon Squad, representing Detroit’s 7 Mile road, often rap about partaking in criminal activities. They’re thugs, after all. But, while several people are harmed over the course of the set, their biggest crime seems to be stealing (sampling) other people’s music. Marvin Gaye is the victim on No Place, about a man serving time in prison. It’s deep but doesn’t leave as much of an impact as No Trust, another prison story that deals with unfaithful “hoes” on the outside. It’s the best song. The chorus doesn’t really make sense; first he says he trusts nobody, then he says he only trusts a few people; plus it plays just once and lasts for only four bars, but it’s catchy and the echoed shout ends it on a perfect note.

The most entertaining song is Lick Lickin, about oral sex and dedicated to the “slut” who performs it. It’s sort of a mock ballad in that the guys are playing around instead of being serious while actually singing instead of rapping. The organ sounds pretty nice though and the Squad manages to stumble upon a few real melodies along the way. This particular form of comic relief is quite welcomed. It’s a funny song. What the album would do better without are the Luke-like dance tracks near the end, some of which are verse-free instrumentals. Their inclusion, all during the second half where they are, comes across as random and off-putting, basically killing any chance of this being a decent rap album.

my rating : 2 of 5

1995