audio review : Love Don’t Live Here Anymore ( song ) … Rose Royce

Singer Gwen Dickey doesn’t have a broken heart. She has an empty one. There’s “just a vacancy” in the place her Love used to Live. He, or she, apparently left her for another; “another home” that is.

The residential metaphors don’t sound as silly as they should over such a soulful groove. Subtle snares aren’t introduced until verse two. This is quiet storm music. Thank goodness for those gutters.

my rating : 5 of 5

1978

audio review : Dance Tonight ( song ) … Lucy Pearl

This song; about going to, and having fun at, a lavish nightclub; represents each member of Lucy Pearl at their best. That means Raphael Saadiq and Dawn Robinson, over one of Ali Shaheed Muhammad’s sleekest beats, have rarely, if ever, sounded better.

They both have nice singing voices, but it’s the melodies that sell it, especially during the verses. If not for Robinson’s background vocals during the chorus, they’d easily upstage it and throw everything off balance. Not that the drinks aren’t doing that already.

There are no red cups in this establishment. That’s Cristal or Dom Pérignon in those glasses. Everyone’s feeling a little tipsy and a little frisky as they shake their bodies; Robinson’s being one of the most attractive among them; on the packed Dance floor.

my rating : 5 of 5

2000

audio review : Dance Tonight ( song ) ... Lucy Pearl

Frosted Flakes

Frosted Flakes

“They’re great,” Tony The Tiger says with a growl. It’s one of the few product slogans I actually agree with. Eating a bowl of Kellogg’s Frosted Flakes in cold milk is one of the sweetest experiences the cereal world has to offer.

If there’s a flaw, it’s that the flakes, which taste better crunchy, start to get soggy after coming in contact with the milk. The fix is to pour a small bowl, add milk, eat fast and repeat until your stomach and taste buds are at odds.

my rating : 5 of 5

audio review : a song from Pretty Woman : He Sleeps

This is the music playing as Pretty Woman Julia Roberts (Vivian) discovers Richard Gere (Edward) sitting asleep on the bed. She kisses him, which leads not just to sex but the metaphorical making of “love”. It’s a nice scene and a good movie. The song is even better.

It, a homestyle orchestral ballad composed by James Newton Howard, in fact deserves a more timeless presentation. The visuals of director Garry Marshall and cinematographer Charles Minsky will become dated, but this beautiful; forget Pretty; music will remain exquisite.

my rating : 5 of 5

1990

video review : Pretty Woman

Publix Premium Limited Edition Ice Cream : Eggnog

Publix Premium Limited Edition Ice Cream : Eggnog

The best way to enjoy this treat, released to Publix stores as a Limited Edition during the Thanksgiving and Christmas holiday season, is to melt it down in a bowl so that you’re left with creamy lumps of Ice Cream in a pool of yummy Eggnog. Flavored with a hint of rum, this Publix Premium is a delicacy I wish were available all year round.

my rating : 5 of 5

Publix Original Eggnog

Publix Original Eggnog

The carton says Grade A and they got that right. Even if the A stands for Astounding or Astonishing, it’s a fitting exaggeration. This Eggnog is thick and creamy. It also tastes delicious. Drink it ice cold with Publix Cinnamon Graham Snack Crackers in your mouth for the full experience.

my rating : 5 of 5

video review : Avatar : The Way Of Water

video review : Avatar : The Way Of Water

James Cameron’s Avatar is comparable to his Terminator movies in that a so-so science fiction flick is followed by a sequel that totally blows it out of the ocean. The Way Of Water at the start seems underwhelming, too much like a visual and narrative rehash of its predecessor, until you’re spirited away to a new world and the brilliant title concept comes into play.

The gist is simple. Several years have passed. “The sky people”, led by a resurrected and vengeful Colonel Quaritch, have returned to Pandora. The Sully family; Jack and Neytiri now have three kids of their own and two they’ve adopted; are therefore forced to leave the Omatikaya in order to keep them safe from harm, which eventually endangers their new Metkayina friends.

Everything about this Avatar is better than the original. It’s an aquatic, ultimately Titanic, adventure. The characterization is especially improved. Jack and Neytiri are actually likable here and their daughters, along with their son’s potential girlfriend Tsireya, provide plenty moments of cuteness. It’s a tulkun (whale) named Payakan though who’ll steal your heart.

my rating : 5 of 5

2022

video review : Avatar : Fire And Ash

Little Caesars Pizza : Classic Pepperoni

Little Caesars Pizza : Classic Pepperoni

Pizza is my favorite food, especially when it’s served fresh from the oven, and Little Caesars is no exception. Pepperoni is the only topping I need; it strikes a near perfect balance with the cheese; and this, their signature pie, is indeed a Classic.

That’s partly thanks to special spices they put in the sauce, which give the flavor its signature zing. The texture varies from soft to crispy depending on how long it’s been cooked, but I prefer mine soft so that the crust tastes like Crazy Bread.

my rating : 5 of 5

Ella-Rae Smith’s physical appearance

Ella-Rae Smith's physical appearance Ella-Rae Smith's physical appearance Ella-Rae Smith's physical appearance Ella-Rae Smith's physical appearance Ella-Rae Smith's physical appearance Ella-Rae Smith's physical appearance

I’d shrink her height down several inches; she’s five-nine and I prefer short girls; but Ella-Rae Smith is otherwise just my type. Slim frame, light skin, cute face; it’s all right. That latter bit is enhanced by a pair of gorgeous turquoise eyes I could get lost in.

It’s a shame she, like most girls, chooses to wear fakeup rather than display her natural beauty. Legs, arms, even unpolished fingers I’ll take when I can get. Her bra size is probably the smallest cup, but A, as far as my tastes (thirsts) go, stands for Amazing.

my rating : 5 of 5

2022

audio review : The Lady In Red ( song ) … Chris De Burgh

Chris should’ve left out the part about hardly knowing this woman because he also mentions the things he’s “never seen” about her, which implies he’s known her for a long time. It’s an odd contradiction and the one ugly flaw on a song that is otherwise quite beautiful.

Most appealing is the melody of the vocals, which are partnered by a gorgeous guitar lick, though it’s the waltzy beat that serves as the basis of the concept. “The Lady In Red is dancing with me,” De Burgh announces as they embrace, “cheek to cheek”, in the ballroom.

my rating : 5 of 5

1986

audio review : The Lady In Red ( song ) ... Chris De Burgh

Yoplait Original : Harvest Peach

Yoplait Original : Harvest Peach

Peaches were never one of my favorite fruits growing up, but a cup of this Yoplait Original cold from the fridge is enough to make a man question his own life values. It’s smooth creamy yogurt with bits of real Harvest Peaches and it’s absolutely delicious.

my rating : 5 of 5

audio review : Morphine ( song ) … Michael Jackson

This song is addictive. It rocks and rolls as a manic Michael Jackson rants and raves; the verses mimic the fragmented thoughts of a broken addict fiending for a fix; over its intense industrial-style beat.

Demerol provides some relief; the song is a rhapsody of sorts; but it’s not the opioid of choice. He “heard what the doctor said”, but he doesn’t give a shit. He’s in pain (dammit) and he wants his Morphine.

my rating : 5 of 5

1997

audio review : Blood On The Dance Floor [ History In The Mix ] ( album ) ... Michael Jackson