I don’t know how he died or how his heart stopped; he’d presumably had some kind of heart attack; but there he; a guy I know also named Marcel; lay, soon to be dead if I didn’t take action. That last bit was a near certainty based on memories of seeing, on TV and such, hearing about and reading about people being resuscitated by paramedics and the like.
The key, I knew, was to act quickly. Michael Jackson; my favorite dead person; might’ve been saved if Conrad Murray had that mindset instead of trying to save his own ass. Not that I admired Marcel like I admire Michael Jackson. In fact I don’t even like Marcel; not really, though he can be fun to hang around on occasion; but I felt morally obligated to try to save him.
I could go into a psychological introspection on why that is; morals, I’m convinced, are completely subjective and I can be a heartless bastard; but try my best to save him I did. CPR was out of the question; I never learned it, hate the thought of having to press into someone’s chest and could never get past the disgust of putting my mouth on his; but I had another way.
For some reason I had with me what I can only describe as some kind of dreamworld defibrillator, which I actually remembered bringing him back to life with in the past. That time he’d come back quickly, but this time, as I repeated the process of basically shocking his chest to jumpstart his heart and brain, it seemed to no avail. Too much time was passing by.
Still I tried. There was no one else around and I would’ve felt damn guilty if I’d given up without a fight; I’m also convinced morals are inherently selfish; so I continued to shock him as he lay there otherwise motionless. Thoughts raced thru my mind during the process, including whether or not that bastard would work as hard to save me. Probably not, I figured.
It didn’t matter though, especially when, after what seemed like minutes of shock treatment, he finally came back to life. I was ecstatic, audibly so, as “My boy!” opened his eyes and started to regain consciousness. There was an underlining concern in my mind that maybe he’d been gone too long and would never be the same, but at least he was alive.
2023 April 29
