Beetlejuice is supposed to be funny. It occasionally is; “I’ve been feeling a little flat”, says a man who looks like he was killed by a steamroller; but the nonstop jokes, led by its title comedian slash “bio-exorcist”, are mostly corny. The two lip-synced song/dance scenes; easily the worst parts of the movie; are downright cringey. A moderately entertaining plot, about a dead married couple trying to scare a family out of their house, lies (buried) underneath.
my rating : 3 of 5
1988
If the cover art reminds you of a Tribe Called Quest album, there’s a reason for that. Every song here, rather its music, is produced by frontman Q-Tip. That makes this the most sonically cohesive and thoroughly hip-hop LL Cool album since Marley’s Marl’s Mama Said Knock You Out. The rapper is still a Force to be reckoned with. Best songs include Saturday Night Special and Black Code Suite.
my rating : 3 of 5
2024
This is a frustrating listen. The chorus, with its background harmonization, sounds awesome; it’s one of the band’s best; but it doesn’t happen enough. It goes once on the first break, twice on the second and three times on the third, but it should be two, two and four. The rest of the song is well below par. I hate the way Michael Stipe says “Give me some”, though it’s cool how Mills drags that bit out at the end.
my rating : 3 of 5
2008
The cover photo has Tinashe looking like a dirty ho, appropriately enough. This set; the second of a proposed trilogy she should’ve saved for one proper album; is mostly about sex. She speaks of romantic (Baby) “love”, but it comes down to “the dick”; albeit No Broke Boys; and probably some pussy given her LGB tendencies. “I’ve been a Nasty girl,” she confesses, or brags, and I’m all for it. Call me Thirsty and you’ll be a day late.
my rating : 3 of 5
2024
Ellen Page is indeed “pretty” as Sylvia Likens; a lot prettier than the girl her character is based on. The broad title doesn’t do her justice. This is a story of not just An American Crime but domestic abuse blatant and extreme enough to reach levels of maudlinism. The plot seems improbable; family and friends joining together to beat and torture one frail teenage girl; but it’s actually whitewashed. The real-life accusations are even worse.
my rating : 3 of 5
2007
Professor X is the one who keeps calling people sissies, but it’s rapper Brother J, with his intellectual diction, who comes across as a teacher. His Lessons, which consist mostly of racial (racist) pro-Black/anti-white bigotry, are debatable to say the least, but the music, which relies heavily on 1970s/1980s soul samples, is Funkin. The best songs are the two with the word Verb in them.
my rating : 3 of 5
1990
This is supposed to be the new Rakim album; his first in a long time; but it doesn’t sound like it. His Rebirth comes across as more of a posthumous project, which is odd because the God Emcee, unlike some of the guests featured here, didn’t die. Still every one of these “Se7en” songs is a collab with at least two other rappers.
The best among them is Chino XL who kills everyone figuratively, and literally via bomb at verse’s end, on a cypher that would’ve been better with no hook. I like Sally Green on the Love song though. DMX sounds stupid on Playground. Rakim can still rap. Too bad he didn’t decide to release a proper (solo) album after all these years.
my rating : 3 of 5
2024
Sir Mix-A-Lot is the Mack Daddy; “the man with the game” when it comes to luring sexy females with his ghetto glitz. The title theme is the best song. Baby Got Back; an ode to black girls with big butts; is another. The Boss Is Back; the worst song; should’ve started the album though. The order is a bit odd. It begins with a story about crooked cops and ends with a political rant against gun control.
my rating : 3 of 5
1992
This isn’t really a Twister sequel; more of a conceptual remake. The plot revolves (ferociously) around a storm chaser/tracker named Kate. She’s eventually saving the day while her two leading hunks hunker in fear; one of many eye-rollingly unrealistic clichés. The movie is fun enough on the whole, but it never lets you forget you’re watching a movie; a cash grab that speaks out against people “profiting off of” others. The irony.
my rating : 3 of 5
2024
The taste of this G Fuel Energy Drink might suggest pineapple, but it’s apparently a blend of pomelo and white peach. It’s “inspired by Naruto Shippuden”; there should be a colon between those last two names; the Sage Mode bit of which themes rather perfectly with this being promoted to enhance “performance energy” and “extreme focus”.
my rating : 3 of 5
The Slim Shady persona never really made sense to me and it still doesn’t; alter egos rarely do; so it’s just as well he kills it off. Eminem is Eminem after all; one rapper and the number one rapper on my “top five” list despite being terribly inconsistent over the years. Lyrically The Slim Shady LP remains the best album I ever heard. He was almost perfectly succinct back then. Now he’s verbose. Compare that Guilty Conscious to this one. “Can’t even form words,” he claims, rather ironically, as if he didn’t already use “words” in that rhyme scheme.
Still The Death Of Slim Shady (LP) is his best since Relapse; appropriately enough given the return to signature themes he hadn’t revisted since, including a message from Paul Rosenberg and monologue by Ken Kaniff. He’s also back to making fun of Christopher Reeves. “A lot of people ask me,” he says on Temporary, but those expecting another trip Underground will be disappointed. It’s a sycamore sap dedication to his daughter. Then, as if one sickeningly sweet ode wasn’t hard enough to stomach, there’s Somebody Save Me.
When he’s not making gay love songs, he’s offending gay people again, along with bisexuals and so-called transgenders, which is refreshing to hear; I detest LGBT and all “woke BS”; though he’s not as provocative as he claims to be. If he were, he’d say “the F word” like he used to and go after more rap peers/successors instead of easy targets; real victims of “cancel” culture; like Diddy and R Kelly… and Candace Owens. Deviant Eminem is the best Eminem and he hasn’t been this deviant in a long time, in other words, but us fans are never satisfied.
“I don’t see no fans,” he says, “All I see’s a bunch of complainers.” I like Houdini though. Evil is good. After that Nights tease from his previous project, I’m also pleasantly surprised to hear a verse from Bizarre; it’s been decades; though Eminem should’ve dropped one over the beat to make it a proper duet. No hook needed, but his Habits bridge is better than White Gold’s. Road Rage; the best beat; is ruined by its. EZ Mil’s Head Honcho is also weak before Em abandons it for a long tedious verse, though he does provide some witty bars elsewhere on the set.
my rating : 3 of 5
2024
When it comes to famous rappers, Eminem is the best. He’s also terribly inconsistent, so a song like this, that has him rapping with a staccato monotone flow while not saying anything particularly clever, does little to accentuate the fact. He and Big Sean follow in the footsteps of BabyTron, but the Tobey Maguire spider/goat bit isn’t as dope as they seem to think it is.
my rating : 3 of 5