Category: reviews

audio review : The Blueprint 2 [ The Gift And The Curse ] ( album ) … Jay-Z

This isn’t only better than the original Blueprint, it’s also Jay-Z’s best album. That’s not really saying much. The rapper is vastly overrated. There are nonetheless a surprising amount of good songs here; enough to fill a single album, which is what this should’ve been. Instead it’s 2 in one; The Gift And The Curse.

I prefer The Gift. That’s where most of the best songs are, including a sequel to Dr Dre’s Watcher that’s even better than the original. It starts with perhaps Jay-Z’s best verse as he outshines even “the great Rakim himself”. Poppin Tags and Excuse Me Miss; a club serenade “for the grown and sexy”; also shine.

The other set is a bit more Cursed with mediocrity; Some People Hate, he says of critics like me; but there is a U Don’t Know Remix that, like the aforementioned Watcher, improves on the original. The Blueprint 2 title song, on which Jay-Z takes more shots at rival Nas, and Meet The Parents are also worth a listen.

my rating : 4 of 5

2002

audio review : Volume 2 [ Hard Knock Life ] … Jay-Z

audio review : Volume 2 [ Hard Knock Life ] ... Jay-Z

This is supposed to be the sequel to In My Lifetime. The reason for the missing title is anyone’s guess; perhaps to avoid the double Life; but that oddity is the album’s one major flaw. The songs themselves are mostly okay. 2 are actually quite good.

Those aforementioned highlights include A Week Ago, on which a surprisingly poignant Jay-Z plays the role of a drug dealer whose long-time friend turns snitch after getting locked up, and a group collaboration entitled Reservoir Dogs.

my rating : 3 of 5

1998

audio review : Lo ( album ) … Paula Cole

audio review : Lo ( album ) ... Paula Cole

Paula Cole should make a whole album screaming. Her best songs tend to be the ones on which she drops the inhibitions and enters maniac mode à la Nietzsche’s Eyes, Elegy and Secretary. She’s now a Wildflower, she proclaims loud enough for the world to hear, and it’s another top pick.

The rest of the album is more guarded and less interesting. It starts off divinely enough. Follow The Moon, with the exception of the last line before each break, beams with melody. The Replacements, on the other hand, should’ve been replaced. Green Eyes Crying is another Lo point.

my rating : 3 of 5

2024

Bucked Up Energy : Rocket Pop

Bucked Up Energy : Rocket Pop

This is an Energy drink based on the Bomb Pop popsicle often referred to as Rocket Pop to avoid trademark infringement. The taste is a blend of blue raspberry, lime and cherry; three of the worst popular fruit flavors. I’d much prefer strawberry, grape and peach, but it is what it is.

my rating : 3 of 5

A Shoc Energy : Swirl Pop

A Shoc Energy : Swirl Pop

This energy drink, despite having zero sugar, is based on “a nostalgic classic” in the candy world; the Swirl Pop. The flavor is an “indistinguishable” blend of cherry, orange and pineapple, though it “contains no fruit juice”. As far as ratings go, the taste is about on par with the Bang Swirly Pop.

my rating : 3 of 5

Thunder CoffeeMilk : Vanilla

Thunder CoffeeMilk : Vanilla

This Thunder tastes better than the Doubleshot version because there’s less Coffee and more Milk, but the name is misleading if not an outright lie. I taste no Vanilla nor is any such flavor included on the short ingredients list. It’s the color of most vanilla drinks though, so I guess that’s supposed to be the link.

my rating : 3 of 5

Thunder CoffeeMilk : Doubleshot

Thunder CoffeeMilk : Doubleshot

This Doubleshot; the most “energizing” CoffeeMilk the Thunder brand has to offer as far as caffeine goes; lives up to the name. It’s a mixture of (“real”) Coffee and (“real”) Milk. The one thing missing from the name is the cane sugar; the third listing on its impressively simply ingredients list; which isn’t sweet enough to counter the fact that you’re drinking coffee.

my rating : 3 of 5

audio review : Richmond Hill ( album ) … Masta Ace + Marco Polo

audio review : Richmond Hill ( album ) ... Masta Ace + Marco Polo

Masta Ace and Marco Polo are skilled at what they do, especially Polo. His beats are pure hip-hop; the boom-bap type that originated in the ghettos of New York City. He’s actually from Richmond Hill, Ontario, hence the title. Breukelen native Masta Ace has been dropping funky rhymes since The Symphony, but he’s sometimes too innovative for his own good.

The rapper has long had the tendency to limit himself to specific lyrical concepts that, over the course of a whole song, come across as somewhat gimmicky. The first word of almost every bar on Connections connects with the word before it. Outside Inside, with C-Red, puts the title words on repeat. All I Want, with Wordsworth, is a list of Christmas wishes.

Brooklyn Heights, all about what it “ain’t”, is one of the best songs though, along with Below The Clouds and Heat Of The Moment. Plant Based and Life Music deal with health, but Ace stays silent on the topic of MS. As a sequel, Hill is on par with the first Story. The worst bits are still the skits, though there should be an epilogue to match the prologue.

my rating : 3 of 5

2024

Madison Brown Fabulous Ice Cream : Cookies N Cream

Madison Brown Fabulous Ice Cream : Cookies N Cream

This doesn’t look like Cookies N Cream. That name is usually reserved for vanilla ice cream with bits of Oreoesque cookies. The ice cream here is a grayish brown with a slight pink hue. It looks closer to chocolate than vanilla but doesn’t really taste like either. The flavor is rather distinct. Fabulous? Not quite. It is good though.

my rating : 4 of 5

audio review : Bitch Betta Have My Money ( album ) … AMG

audio review : Bitch Betta Have My Money ( album ) ... AMG

The title, based on the album’s lead single, is silly, but perhaps that’s appropriate. AMG is a rapper who likes to have fun. That fun comes almost exclusively in the form of sex with, or at least sexual attraction to, Bitches. It’s an obsession I can relate to, though I prefer the small Booty ones. Best songs include Nu Exasize, Jiggable Pie and Vertical Joyride.

my rating : 3 of 5

1991

3D Energy Drink : Alphaland [ Lemonade ]

3D Energy Drink : Alphaland [ Lemonade ]

I don’t know what the Alphaland bit is about, but this 3D Energy Drink tastes like what it essentially is; carbonated Lemonade. It’s “light and refreshing” as promoted. The “intense rush” comes via 200 milligrams of caffeine. The flavor suggests a lot of sugar, but there is none. It’s sweetened with sucralose.

my rating : 3 of 5

Freshness Guaranteed Apple Pie [ No Sugar Added ]

Freshness Guaranteed Apple Pie [ No Sugar Added ]

There’s No Sugar Added, but what’s the catch? Gas from sorbitol. It’s a relatively minor drawback for a relatively “fresh-from-the bakery” (Walmart) Apple Pie that’s about as good as any you’ll have. The crust is cute, but the best part is the main ingredient; the sweet Apples themselves. This is a treat best served not warm but cold from the fridge.

my rating : 4 of 5