Metro’s track record suggests you can Trust him to provide a Boomin beat. This album, which would’ve been better suited as a mixtape, is no exception. His music, though too many of the drums and trap ticks sound alike, are the best part. Whether Future’s semi-retarded vocals help or hurt matters is the question for any given song, though it’s guest rapper Kendrick Lamar who’s most annoying.
my rating : 3 of 5
2024
As impressive as the ingredients list may be; it includes flowers and the word “organic” appears ten times; plain water is healthier. Is it tastier? I guess that depends. Strawberry is one of the best fruits in that regards, but Lemon leaves a lot to be desired. Not that the flavor is akin to either. This tastes like sweet tea to me.
my rating : 3 of 5
They should’ve called this one Strawberry Bubblegum. That’s what the flavor, which tastes artificial though the can, while admitting there’s “0% juice”, insists it isn’t, brings to mind. I can’t detect any Watermelon. Perhaps the Warlord is having an identity crisis. There is, however, a whopping 300 milligrams of “natural” caffeine.
my rating : 3 of 5
This smells and tastes like Rice Krispies Treats. Why it’s not marketed as such is the question. What’s missing is the gooey texture. Biting into it is more like eating a Krackel or Crunch bar except that it’s Marshmallow flavored instead of chocolate, which makes it better. The sweetness is a bit much though.
my rating : 3 of 5
![Rip It [ Sugar Free ] : Citrus X](https://marcellee.com/posts/126106.jpg)
They should’ve just called this Orange. It’s no mystery. That’s the Citrus fruit it tastes like the most. The “energy fuel”, its promo suggests, “Pairs well with breakfast, pizza, and setting up camp in a cave of grizzlies after hiking for 24 hours.” I prefer it at home, not with but after a meal, when I’d rather work on something thru the night instead of going to sleep.
my rating : 3 of 5
The title makes no sense. It should be Cowgirl Carter. Not that there’s a sense of authenticity to Beyoncé’s ghetto ass riding off to the country. This is, to be clear, essentially a country music album with song titles like Riverdance, Levi’s Jeans, Sweet Honey Buckiin and Spaghettii. Those tacky “ii” bits representative the fact that it’s also the Act 2 follow-up to Renaissance.
That album sounds better if only because, when all else fails, you’ll get lost in its grooves. The beats here are mostly par for the course of a genre that relies more on vocal melodies, which Beyoncé has little talent for. The dive bar is packed when she sings her songs; her popularity assures it; but you’ll be hard pressed to find a catchy hook to hang your hat on.
I do like her Daughter; not that annoying chicklet on Protector but the song called Daughter. I like it a lot. The ballad, which dabbles in themes of patriarchy and Christianity, is surprisingly splendid. It’s a little bit country but mostly Celtic. Hopefully it will be played at the genre reveal party for Act 3 and she swaps those dadgum Cowboy clothes for (just) a torc.
my rating : 3 of 5
2024
“I see the way the game played,” Dr Dre declares at one point. If that’s a subliminal reference to the concept of this EP; a soundtrack for Grand Theft Auto; his penmen are more clever than they seem. This is, on paper, a random set of new Dre songs; a rarity these days, like the renowned producer making a beat on his own.
These six songs are co-produced; if not, as I suspect, solely produced; by different people. That, along with the fact that Dre, like dinnermate Puffy, is known to Contract ghostwriters, makes this EP his in the loosest sense. That it sounds more like Compton than another dose of the Chronic is more or less a sign of the times.
my rating : 3 of 5
2022
![Rip It [ Sugar Free ] : Tribute](https://marcellee.com/posts/125759.jpg)
The flavor here is a blend of “active” mandarin (orange) and “live wild” lime; one of the best fruits and one of the worst. An energy drink based on just the former could be a welcomed addition to the Rip It collection, though the taste would nonetheless be dampered by the overwhelming sting of carbonation. The concept is a Tribute to “our troops”. The brand is apparently a favorite in the US Army.
my rating : 3 of 5
![Rip It [ Sugar Free ] : Power](https://marcellee.com/posts/125746.jpg)
The name suggests this Rip It would be appropriate to consume before a boxing match or weightlifting competition; any physical activity that relies on Power. According to the promo, it “packs the unique flavor of what we imagine a sonic boom tastes like”. In fact it tastes like a standard Energy drink.
my rating : 3 of 5
This is the Pure Zero; sugar free thus theoretically healthier; version of Rockstar Punched Fruit Punch. If there’s a difference in taste, it’s negligible if not undetectable. This too tastes like Hawaiian Punch or Tropical Punch Kool-Aid with carbonation.
my rating : 3 of 5
Is this “great new JT album” Everything I Thought It Was going to be? Basically yes. A decent; nowhere near great; soul croon set with perhaps a few good songs is what I’ve come to expect from Justin Timberlake and that’s exactly what this is. He’s still romancing the girls with declarations of Love; the conceptual crutch for his genre of choice; and calling up Timbaland to make beats. Listen for the producer’s inept vocal ad-libs.
The reason Justin Timberlake never reached; again nowhere near; the level of Michael Jackson; his most obvious comparison in regard to career trajectory; to my ears is that his songs just don’t pop. Never mind his lack of stylistic flair. All it would take to make this album good, maybe even “great”, are better melodies, specifically at the choruses where it matters. The best here in that regard include Conditions, No Angels and Selfish.
my rating : 3 of 5
2024
I prefer my ice cream in cups. These Blue Bunny Twists are no exception. The actual sugar Cones taste okay enough, but they don’t mesh well with the “frozen dairy dessert”, which, though I wish it were more Cheesecake than Strawberry, is pretty good.
my rating : 3 of 5